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I mean, come on now… Does every conversation need a fart reference? Are you all a hive mind? I’m kidding, Dad. I totally respect the dad comedy. 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Finally, not just a boring birthday card. \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eCard Size (folded): 5\"W x 7\" H\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003eBlank inside.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003eIncludes envelope \u0026amp; poly bag sleeve\u003cbr\u003e© 2022 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eSold in packs of 6.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576887881868,"sku":"BW-AQU","price":1.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_ASTROLOGYCARDS_BLUEFABRICHAND_SMALLSQUARE_BW-AQU.jpg?v=1772044623"},{"product_id":"capricorn-astrology-greeting-card-new","title":"Capricorn Astrology Greeting Card","description":"\u003cp\u003eGive 'em something to think about for their birthday week with tear-off affirmations! Finally, not just a boring birthday card. \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eCard Size (folded): 5\"W x 7\" H\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003eBlank inside.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003eIncludes envelope \u0026amp; poly bag sleeve\u003cbr\u003e© 2022 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eSold in packs of 6.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576888045708,"sku":"BW-CAP","price":1.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_ASTROLOGYCARDS_BLUEFABRIC_SMALLSQUARE_BW-CAP.jpg?v=1772044920"},{"product_id":"guys-in-the-woods-subtext-greeting-card-new","title":"Guys In The Woods Greeting Card","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eCard Size (folded): 4 1\/4\"W x 5 1\/2\" H\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eBlank inside.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003eIncludes envelope \u0026amp; poly bag sleeve\u003cbr\u003e© 2022 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\n\u003cem\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eSold in packs of 6.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576888144012,"sku":"ST-WOODS","price":1.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_GREETINGCARDS_WOOD_SMALLSQUARE_ST-WOODS.jpg?v=1772472221"},{"product_id":"shit-faced-every-day-subtext-greeting-card-new","title":"Shit-faced Every Day Greeting Card","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eCard Size (folded): 4 1\/4\"W x 5 1\/2\" H\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eBlank inside.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003eIncludes envelope \u0026amp; poly bag sleeve\u003cbr\u003e© 2022 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\n\u003cem\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eSold in packs of 6.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576888406156,"sku":"ST-SHITFACED","price":1.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_GREETINGCARDS_WOOD_SMALLSQUARE_ST-SHITFACED.jpg?v=1772472914"},{"product_id":"cards-are-a-scam-subtext-greeting-card-new","title":"Cards Are A Scam Greeting Card","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eCard Size (folded): 4 1\/4\"W x 5 1\/2\" H\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eBlank inside.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003eIncludes envelope \u0026amp; poly bag sleeve\u003cbr\u003e© 2022 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\n\u003cem\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eSold in packs of 6.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576888471692,"sku":"ST-SCAM","price":1.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_GREETINGCARDS_WOOD_SMALLSQUARE_ST-SCAM.jpg?v=1772471637"},{"product_id":"federal-prison-subtext-greeting-card-new","title":"Federal Prison Greeting Card","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eCard Size (folded): 4 1\/4\"W x 5 1\/2\" H\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eBlank inside.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003eIncludes envelope \u0026amp; poly bag sleeve\u003cbr\u003e© 2022 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\n\u003cem\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eSold in packs of 6.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576888897676,"sku":"ST-PRISON","price":1.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_GREETINGCARDS_WOOD_SMALLSQUARE_ST-PRISON.jpg?v=1772472064"},{"product_id":"silenced-enemies-subtext-greeting-card-new","title":"Silenced Enemies Greeting Card","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eCard Size (folded): 4 1\/4\"W x 5 1\/2\" H\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eBlank inside.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003eIncludes envelope \u0026amp; poly bag sleeve\u003cbr\u003e© 2022 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\n\u003cem\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eSold in packs of 6.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576889028748,"sku":"ST-ENEMIES","price":1.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_GREETINGCARDS_WOOD_SMALLSQUARE_ST-ENEMIES.jpg?v=1772473029"},{"product_id":"less-empty-subtext-greeting-card-new","title":"Less Empty Greeting Card","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eCard Size (folded): 4 1\/4\"W x 5 1\/2\" H\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eBlank inside.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003eIncludes envelope \u0026amp; poly bag sleeve\u003cbr\u003e© 2022 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\n\u003cem\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eSold in packs of 6.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576889159820,"sku":"ST-EMPTY","price":1.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_GREETINGCARDS_WOOD_SMALLSQUARE_ST-EMPTY.jpg?v=1772472627"},{"product_id":"never-had-any-dreams-subtext-greeting-card-new","title":"Never Had Any Dreams Greeting Card","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eCard Size (folded): 4 1\/4\"W x 5 1\/2\" H\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eBlank inside.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003eIncludes envelope \u0026amp; poly bag sleeve\u003cbr\u003e© 2022 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\n\u003cem\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eSold in packs of 6.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576889192588,"sku":"ST-DREAMS","price":1.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_GREETINGCARDS_WOOD_SMALLSQUARE_ST-DREAMS.jpg?v=1772472743"},{"product_id":"stick-it-prank-stickers-new-1","title":"Stick It! 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Believe me, your Great Aunt Phyllis is going to love finding out that her pudding cups were manufactured by leprechauns.\u003cspan class=\"Apple-converted-space\"\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eStick It! 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There are still plenty of us out there who like you: elementary school kids, golfers, artists, and uhhh… did I say schoolchildren already? But hey, things could be worse. I mean, who wants to be a crayon, right? So hold your head high, humble pencil. You’ll always have a place in our hearts and at our desks… at least until we toss you out.\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cb\u003eLow Self-Esteem Pencils\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e© 2021 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils Made in the USA\u003cbr\u003eBox Size: 7 \u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e½\" H x 2 ½\" W x ⅜\" L\u003cbr\u003eSold in 4-packs\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eNote: \u003c\/strong\u003eWhen ordering please specify if you want the old style boxes.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576908001420,"sku":"LOW-P","price":6.25,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_PENCILS_BROWN_SMALLSQUARE_LOW-P.jpg?v=1771269292"},{"product_id":"pencils-for-lefties","title":"Pencils for Lefties","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 20px;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eYOU'RE WEIRD.\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\nNo, but seriously. Can you just suck it up and start using your right hand like everyone else in the developed world? You’re making us look bad with all your creativity and success. It’s like you’re part of a secret club we can never join. And frankly, the rest of us have the right to feel left out. See what I did there? That’s the best thing a right-hander can come up with. We need you weirdos.\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cb\u003eLefties Pencils\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e© 2021 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils Made in the USA\u003cbr\u003eBox Size: 7 \u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e½\" H x 2 ½\" W x ⅜\" L\u003cbr\u003eSold in 4-packs\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eNote: \u003c\/strong\u003eWhen ordering please specify if you want the old style boxes.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576908066956,"sku":"LEF-P","price":6.25,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_PENCILS_BROWN_SMALLSQUARE_LEF-P.jpg?v=1771264302"},{"product_id":"copy-of-pencils-for-happy-hour","title":"Pencils for Happy Hour","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 20px;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003ePOUR ME ANOTHER, PLEASE.\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\nAhhh, it’s finally that magical time of the day again: when you can put all your office woes aside and crack open a cold one. Or twelve. Here’s to another chance to find the answers to life’s questions at the bottom of a bottle. So what if it’s only 10 AM, who says happy hour has to start at five, anyway? Just don’t tell Brent from HR, okay?\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cb\u003eHappy Hour Pencils\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e© 2021 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils Made in the USA\u003cbr\u003eBox Size: 7 \u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e½\" H x 2 ½\" W x ⅜\" L\u003cbr\u003eSold in 4-packs\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eNote: \u003c\/strong\u003eWhen ordering please specify if you want the old style boxes.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576908198028,"sku":"HAP-P","price":6.25,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_PENCILS_BROWN_SMALLSQUARE_HAP-P.jpg?v=1771263833"},{"product_id":"pencils-for-days-of-the-week","title":"Pencils for Days of the Week","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 20px;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eWOW, WHAT A CONCEPT.\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\nNo longer do you have an excuse not to use a fresh pencil each and every day! Plus, we’ve even included (at no extra cost) a handy Blursday pencil for those days when you can’t be bothered to figure out what day it actually is. And honestly, if you’re buying these pencils, that’s probably gonna be pretty often.\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cb\u003eDays of the Week Pencils\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e© 2021 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils Made in the USA\u003cbr data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003eBox Size: 7 ½\" H x 2 ½\" W x ⅜\" L\u003cbr data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003eSold in 4-packs\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eNote: \u003c\/strong\u003eWhen ordering please specify if you want the old style boxes.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576908329100,"sku":"DAY-P","price":6.25,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_PENCILS_BROWN_SMALLSQUARE_DAY-P.jpg?v=1771261358"},{"product_id":"shit-show-colored-pencils","title":"Shit Show Colored Pencils","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 20px;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eShit Show.\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWho doesn’t love colored pencils? Turn that gray world Technicolor with our new Shit Show Colored Pencil Set.\u003cspan class=\"Apple-converted-space\"\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cb\u003eShit Show Colored Pencils 8-Pack\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003ci\u003e8 brightly colored pre-sharpened pencils packed into a sturdy slide-out box\u003c\/i\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e© 2020 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003ci\u003e8 brightly colored pre-sharpened pencils packed into a sturdy slide-out box\u003cbr\u003eDimensions: 7 ⅝\" H x 2 \u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e⅝\" W x 1\" L\u003cbr\u003eSold in 4-packs\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576930021516,"sku":"SHI-P","price":4.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_COLOREDPENCILS_BROWNHAND_SMALLSQUARE_SHI-P.jpg?v=1771269940"},{"product_id":"pencils-for-boomers-vs-millennials","title":"Pencils for Boomers Vs. Millennials - Original","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 20px;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003ePASS THE POPCORN.\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\nWith the two largest generations in history at each other’s virtual throats on social media, this is the most epic battle since white or wheat. Who’s more entitled? Who’s more maligned? And does it even matter? HEY. Of course it does. Ask any one of them. But really. Pass the popcorn. This is some serious entertainment.\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cb\u003eBoomers Vs. Millennials Pencils\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e© 2020 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils Made in the USA\u003cbr\u003eBox Size: 7 ½\" H x 2 ½\" W x ⅜\" L\u003cbr\u003eSold in 4-packs\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576948994188,"sku":"BOO-P","price":6.25,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_PENCILS_OGP_9.3.23_WEB-08.jpg?v=1771260056"},{"product_id":"pencils-for-cat-people","title":"Pencils for Cat People","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 20px;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eHERE KITTY, KITTY...\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\nI have a surprise for youuuu.... Darn it, where are you? Remember that time you told me you wished you could be a little policeman? I’m sure you said that. And I’ve got JUST the costume for that! Come on, kitty, kitty. My Instagram followers are waiting.\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cb\u003eCat People Pencils\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e© 2020 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils Made in the USA\u003cbr\u003eBox Size: 7 ½\" H x 2 ½\" W x ⅜\" L\u003cbr\u003eSold in 4-packs\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eNote: \u003c\/strong\u003eWhen ordering please specify if you want the old style boxes.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576949026956,"sku":"CAT-P","price":6.25,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_PENCILS_BROWN_SMALLSQUARE_CAT-P_21cf586c-1fa4-4aa5-9fad-74b58cddbfd5.jpg?v=1771260366"},{"product_id":"pencils-for-dog-people","title":"Pencils for Dog People","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 20px;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eIT WAS THE DOG, I SWEAR!\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\nLook, I don’t know if you know this about my dog, but he’s verrry gassy. So if you get a whiff of anything remotely off, it was the dog, ok? He’s also responsible for the missing cheesecake in the fridge. I don’t know how he does it! The scoundrel.\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cb\u003eDog People Pencils\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e© 2020 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils Made in the USA\u003cbr\u003eBox Size: 7 \u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e½\" H x 2 ½\" W x ⅜\" L\u003cbr\u003eSold in 4-packs\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eNote: \u003c\/strong\u003eWhen ordering please specify if you want the old style boxes.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576949125260,"sku":"DOG-P","price":6.25,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_PENCILS_BROWN_SMALLSQUARE_DOG-P_db9760ee-4f05-4018-b786-47628b259733.jpg?v=1771261806"},{"product_id":"pencils-for-nurses","title":"Pencils for Nurses","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 20px;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eMAY I TAKE YOUR ORDER?\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\nYou must be completely delusional if you think I’m a waiter, pal. In fact, I could argue that your very existence is at the mercy of my skilled, capable hands right now. So too bad if you don’t like the green Jell-o. Shut your trap and maybe I’ll come back to check on you. Key word: maybe.\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cb\u003eNurses Pencils\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e© 2020 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils Made in the USA\u003cbr\u003eBox Size: 7 \u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e½\" H x 2 ½\" W x ⅜\" L\u003cbr\u003eSold in 4-packs\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eNote: \u003c\/strong\u003eWhen ordering please specify if you want the old style boxes.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576949158028,"sku":"NUR-P","price":6.25,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_PENCILS_BROWN_SMALLSQUARE_NUR-P.jpg?v=1771265481"},{"product_id":"pencils-for-gravestone-ideas","title":"Pencils for Gravestone Ideas - Original","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 20px;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eI TOLD YOU I WAS SICK.\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\nAbsolute genius last words to carve onto your gravestone. Why bother with father, mother, son, daughter? Beloved pet, bah! Boring. Really, the only proper way to go out is to get the very last word. That, or leave them wondering for all eternity. Who dis?\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cb\u003eGravestone Ideas Pencils\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e© 2020 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils Made in the USA\u003cbr\u003eBox Size: 7 \u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e½\" H x 2 ½\" W x ⅜\" L\u003cbr\u003eSold in 4-packs\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576949256332,"sku":"GRA-P","price":6.25,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_PENCILS_OGP_9.3.23_WEB-05.jpg?v=1771263524"},{"product_id":"pencils-for-zero-fucks-new","title":"Pencils for Zero Fucks","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 20px;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eNo fucks.\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWe hear you. You're so over it you can't even. This newly-concocted bad attitude is just what the doctor ordered! Plus, none of us really liked it when you were just a simple, caring, average Joe. So kudos to you! Even though you couldn't give a F. We know. Fresh out.\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cb\u003eZero Fucks Pencils\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e© 2020 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils Made in the USA\u003cbr\u003eBox Size: 7 \u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e½\" H x 2 ½\" W x ⅜\" L\u003cbr\u003eSold in 4-packs\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eNote: \u003c\/strong\u003eWhen ordering please specify if you want the old style boxes.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576955744396,"sku":"ZER-P","price":6.25,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_PENCILS_BROWN_SMALLSQUARE_ZER-P.jpg?v=1771268850"},{"product_id":"pencils-for-the-office-new","title":"Pencils for The Office","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 20px;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eOh, cool.\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIt’s Monday again. Feels like I just clocked out. Know what I love about Mondays? Nothing. In fifteen minutes, I’ll be sleeping with my eyes open for an hour-long meeting about employee morale followed by a “surprise” birthday cake and card everyone half-heartedly signs while doing a slow eye-roll. Which is the same eye-roll I’ll be making when I read it, ‘cuz it’s my birthday and even that won’t fix a Monday.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cb\u003eThe Office Pencils\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e© 2020 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils Made in the USA\u003cbr\u003eBox Size: 7 \u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e½\" H x 2 ½\" W x ⅜\" L\u003cbr\u003eSold in 4-packs\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eNote: \u003c\/strong\u003eWhen ordering please specify if you want the old style boxes.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576955809932,"sku":"OFF-P","price":6.25,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_PENCILS_BROWN_SMALLSQUARE_OFF-P.jpg?v=1771267976"},{"product_id":"copy-of-pencils-for-procrastinators-new","title":"Pencils for Procrastinators","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 20px;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eTwo weeks.\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eGo ahead, ask me anything. Invariably, the answer will be “two weeks.” Wondering when I’ll get my grades up? Two weeks. Get my grades up and start working out? Two weeks. Get my grades up, start working out, call my dad, visit my Nana in Florida, get married, buy a house, file for divorce, start my own business and run for office? Two weeks, pal. Two. Weeks.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cb\u003eProcrastinators Pencils\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e© 2020 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils Made in the USA\u003cbr\u003eBox Size: 7 \u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e½\" H x 2 ½\" W x ⅜\" L\u003cbr\u003eSold in 4-packs\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eNote: \u003c\/strong\u003eWhen ordering please specify if you want the old style boxes.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576956072076,"sku":"PRO-P","price":6.25,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_PENCILS_BROWN_SMALLSQUARE_PRO-P.jpg?v=1771266574"},{"product_id":"pencils-for-truth-new","title":"Pencils for Truth","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 20px;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eI'm a fake vegan.\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eHey, wouldn’t it be nice if people just told the truth every once in a while? I mean, nobody wants to hear that Susan thinks your baby is weird looking, but does she have to go on and on about how ADORABLE he is, only to snicker with the entire Human Resources department behind your back? Susan, Susan, Susan. Just wait til you have a baby.\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cb\u003eTruth Pencils\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e© 2020 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils Made in the USA\u003cbr\u003eBox Size: 7 \u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e½\" H x 2 ½\" W x ⅜\" L\u003cbr\u003eSold in 4-packs\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eNote: \u003c\/strong\u003eWhen ordering please specify if you want the old style boxes.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576956137612,"sku":"TRU-P","price":6.25,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_PENCILS_BROWN_SMALLSQUARE_TRU-P.jpg?v=1771268405"},{"product_id":"pencils-for-little-white-lies-new","title":"Pencils for Little White Lies","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 20px;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eOMG, Crossfit? YES.\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eI looooove working out. If I could, I would do it 24\/7. It’s just that I have all these obligations and such since I took that sabbatical from work. Oh, yeah, technically they called it “fired” but I was going to take a creative break anyway. And I LOVE my free time! I mean, I don’t really have any, of course, and that’s why I’m not hitting the gym at the moment....\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cb\u003eLittle White Lies Pencils\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e© 2020 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils Made in the USA\u003cbr\u003eBox Size: 7 \u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e½\" H x 2 ½\" W x ⅜\" L\u003cbr\u003eSold in 4-packs\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eNote: \u003c\/strong\u003eWhen ordering please specify if you want the old style boxes.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576956170380,"sku":"LIT-P","price":6.25,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_PENCILS_BROWN_SMALLSQUARE_LIT-P.jpg?v=1771264649"},{"product_id":"pencils-for-okay-moms-new","title":"Pencils for Okay Moms","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 20px;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCONGRATULATIONS\u003c\/strong\u003e.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\nYou're the world's okayest mom! Please don’t take offense! Face it, perfect moms are the absolute worst, what with their spotless car seats, healthy and organic snacks packed neatly in recyclable containers, and quick-draw first aid kits. Okay moms are where it’s at. Okay moms are where you want to live: sippy cup wine, the five-second rule, and naps that overlap into second naps.\n\u003cdiv\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cb\u003eOkay Moms Pencils\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e© 2020 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils Made in the USA\u003cbr\u003eBox Size: 7 \u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e½\" H x 2 ½\" W x ⅜\" L\u003cbr\u003eSold in 4-packs\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eNote: \u003c\/strong\u003eWhen ordering please specify if you want the old style boxes.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576959971468,"sku":"OKA-P","price":6.25,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_PENCILS_BROWN_SMALLSQUARE_OKA-P.jpg?v=1771266088"},{"product_id":"excuse-pencils-for-introverts-new","title":"Excuse Pencils for Introverts","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 20px;\" data-mce-style=\"font-size: 20px;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\" data-mce-style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003ePEOPLE SUCK.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\nThat’s why you prefer to stay inside with your stuffed animal collection. But sometimes it’s a little hard to admit that in public. So we’ve carefully crafted a few extremely plausible excuses to get you out of all those pesky social obligations. Like happy hour. Your niece’s school play. Office parties. Your wedding.\n\u003cdiv\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cb\u003eIntrovert Excuse Pencils\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e© 2020 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils Made in the USA\u003cbr\u003eBox Size: 7 \u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e½\" H x 2 ½\" W x ⅜\" L\u003cbr\u003eSold in 4-packs\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576960135308,"sku":"INT-P","price":6.25,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_PENCILS_BROWN_SMALLSQUARE_INT-P.jpg?v=1771259693"},{"product_id":"pencils-for-first-world-problems-new","title":"Pencils for First World Problems","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 20px;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eAWWWWW....\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\nI hear you're having a bad day. First of all, your wifi sucks, so Shameless is totally lagging. Plus, it’s 95 outside but you're shivering under a blanket because the AC is SO freezing, and now your gluten-free muffin was the BEST gluten-free muffin you've ever had until you realized they gave you the one with almonds. And we both know you said NO NUTS.\n\u003cdiv\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cb\u003eFirst World Problems Pencils\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e© 2020 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils Made in the USA\u003cbr\u003eBox Size: 7 \u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e½\" H x 2 ½\" W x ⅜\" L\u003cbr\u003eSold in 4-packs\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eNote: \u003c\/strong\u003eWhen ordering please specify if you want the old style boxes.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576960233612,"sku":"FIR-P","price":6.25,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_PENCILS_BROWN_SMALLSQUARE_FIR-P.jpg?v=1771262596"},{"product_id":"pencils-for-writers-block-new","title":"Pencils for Writer's Block","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 20px;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eTIRED OF FEELING LIKE A BONE-DRY HACK?\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\nSo the wordsmith’s well has run dry? Try this pack of Writer’s Block pencils. If these pencils don’t help you churn out regurgitated ideas and probably a vampire, I’ll eat my hat. It’s a fedora, by the way. Cool vampires wear fedoras now. Put that in your crack pipe and smoke it. Or in your book. Either way, you’re gonna need these pencils ASAP. Even crap won’t write itself.\n\u003cdiv\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cb\u003eWriter's Block Pencils\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e© 2020 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils Made in the USA\u003cbr\u003eBox Size: 7 \u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e½\" H x 2 ½\" W x ⅜\" L\u003cbr\u003eSold in 4-packs\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eNote: \u003c\/strong\u003eWhen ordering please specify if you want the old style boxes.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576960397452,"sku":"WRI-P","price":6.25,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_PENCILS_BROWN_SMALLSQUARE_WRI-P.jpg?v=1771268610"},{"product_id":"copy-of-copy-of-pencils-for-teachers-new","title":"Pencils for The Middle Child","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 20px;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eWHO ARE YOU AGAIN?\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\nThe only thing worse than being unnoticed is still being unnoticed when your hair is neon pink and you dress like you’re in the Matrix. Um, hello? Being the first child ain’t all that. The only people who think so are #1. My older sibling and #2. My dumb parents. And I haven’t even gotten to the part about the (cry)baby of the family. Ay caramba.\n\u003cdiv\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cb\u003eThe Middle Child Pencils\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e© 2020 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils Made in the USA\u003cbr\u003eBox Size: 7 \u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e½\" H x 2 ½\" W x ⅜\" L\u003cbr\u003eSold in 4-packs\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eNote: \u003c\/strong\u003eWhen ordering please specify if you want the old style boxes.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576960495756,"sku":"MID-P","price":6.25,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_PENCILS_BROWN_SMALLSQUARE_MID-P.jpg?v=1771267695"},{"product_id":"copy-of-pencils-for-teachers-new","title":"Pencils for Teachers","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 20px;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eIT'S A SNOW DAY SOMEWHERE...\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\nBut not for you! You have another full day of dealing with other people’s children AND their classroom shenanigans. And it’s not that you don’t love teaching. It’s more that nobody truly appreciates all the garbage you go through just to do your job. Isn’t it time people started thanking YOU for YOUR service?\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cb\u003eTeachers Pencils\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e© 2020 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils Made in the USA\u003cbr\u003eBox Size: 7 \u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e½\" H x 2 ½\" W x ⅜\" L\u003cbr\u003eSold in 4-packs\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eNote: \u003c\/strong\u003eWhen ordering please specify if you want the old style boxes.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576960561292,"sku":"TEA-P","price":6.25,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_PENCILS_BROWN_SMALLSQUARE_TEA-P_7111eea0-cc3f-491b-9b27-b6865d7d259d.jpg?v=1771267038"},{"product_id":"pencils-for-grammar-police-new","title":"Pencils for Grammar Police","description":"\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv id=\"product_description\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 20px;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eYOUR ANNOYING.\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003eAhahaha. It’s so easy to get under your skin. Just wanted to shoot a quick message to let you know how impressed we all are that you finally figured out the difference between your and you’re. Welcome to the grammar club, smarty pants. But as a club member, you now have to quit whining about other people’s grammatical errors. Trust me on this point, you're still making some.\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cb\u003eGrammar Police Pencils\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cem\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e© 2020 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e8-pack Standard No. 2 Pencils Made in the USA\u003cbr\u003eBox Size: 7 \u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e½\" H x 2 ½\" W x ⅜\" L\u003cbr\u003eSold in 4-packs\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eNote: \u003c\/strong\u003eWhen ordering please specify if you want the old style boxes.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003cdiv\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576960626828,"sku":"GRA-P","price":6.25,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_PENCILS_BROWN_SMALLSQUARE_GRA-P_f2240e35-18da-492d-afc5-3837e108048b.jpg?v=1771263388"},{"product_id":"astrology-pencils-sagittarius-new","title":"Astrology Pencils Sagittarius","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 20px;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSAGITTARIUS\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003eNovember 22 - December 21\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSagittarius Traits:\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e• Independent\u003cbr\u003e• Open-Minded\u003cbr\u003e• Reckless\u003cbr\u003e• Wanderer\u003cbr\u003e• Blunt\u003cbr\u003e• Philosopher\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003ePencils:\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• \u003c\/span\u003eI EXIST, THEREFORE TACOS\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• \u003c\/span\u003eVOTED MOST LIKELY TO LIVE IN A TENT\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003e•  LOL WHY R U SO SERIOUS?\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• IT'S 4:20 SOMEWHERE\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• \u003c\/span\u003eI NEED TO BE SOMEWHERE ELSE\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• \u003c\/span\u003eI DON'T DO FAKE\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• \u003c\/span\u003eRANDOM THOUGHTS SQUAD\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• \u003c\/span\u003eMENTALLY SINGLE\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e(Backwards selfie pencil!)\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eContains 8 Standard No. 2 Pencils\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e© 2020 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003e8 custom pencils made specifically for each sign. Each set features a \"selfie pencil\" with backwards writing to fulfill all your selfie needs...we see you, Leo. \u003cbr\u003eBox size: 8 \u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e¼\" H x 3 ⅜\" W x ½\" L\u003cbr\u003eSold in 4-packs\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003e \u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576963149964,"sku":"SAG-P","price":7.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_ASTROLOGYPENCILS_GREENHAND_SMALLSQUARE_SAG-P.jpg?v=1772050855"},{"product_id":"astrology-pencils-scorpio-new","title":"Astrology Pencils Scorpio","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 20px;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSCORPIO\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003eOctober 23 - November 21\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eScorpio Traits:\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e• Passionate\u003cbr\u003e• Obsessive\u003cbr\u003e• Vindictive\u003cbr\u003e• Suspicious\u003cbr\u003e• Intense\u003cbr\u003e• Competitive\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003ePencils:\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• \u003c\/span\u003eCHECKMATE.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• \u003c\/span\u003eWHO ARE YOU AGAIN?\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• \u003c\/span\u003eREVENGE IS BEST SERVED CONSTANTLY\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• \u003c\/span\u003eTWIRLING MY INVISIBLE MOUSTACHE\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• \u003c\/span\u003eEVIL MASTERMIND\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• \u003c\/span\u003eBEST FRENEMIES FOREVER\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• \u003c\/span\u003ePROFESSIONAL STALKER\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• \u003c\/span\u003eFIERCE AF (Backwards selfie pencil!)\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eContains 8 Standard No. 2 Pencils\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e© 2020 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003e8 custom pencils made specifically for each sign. Each set features a \"selfie pencil\" with backwards writing to fulfill all your selfie needs...we see you, Leo. \u003cbr\u003eBox size: 8 \u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e¼\" H x 3 ⅜\" W x ½\" L\u003cbr\u003eSold in 4-packs\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003e \u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576963215500,"sku":"SCO-P","price":7.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_ASTROLOGYPENCILS_GREEN_SMALLSQUARE_SCO-P.jpg?v=1772050976"},{"product_id":"astrology-pencils-libra-new","title":"Astrology Pencils Libra","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 20px;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eLIBRA\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003eSeptember 23 - October 22\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eLibra Traits:\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e• Diplomatic\u003cbr\u003e• People-Pleaser\u003cbr\u003e• Passive-Aggressive\u003cbr\u003e• Indecisive\u003cbr\u003e• Superficial\u003cbr\u003e• Flirt\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003ePencils:\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• \u003c\/span\u003eTHANKS FOR NOTHING\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• \u003c\/span\u003eI'M SORRY I SAY SORRY ALL THE TIME \u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• I'M DATING SOMEONE BUT WE CAN TEXT\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• \u003c\/span\u003eIT'S NO PROBLEM!!!!\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• \u003c\/span\u003eEASILY DISTRACTE...\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• \u003c\/span\u003eWHY CAN'T WE ALL GET ALONG?\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• \u003c\/span\u003ePRETTY PETTY,  BUT STILL PRETTY\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• \u003c\/span\u003eADORABLE AF\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e(Backwards selfie pencil!)\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eContains 8 Standard No. 2 Pencils\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e© 2020 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003e8 custom pencils made specifically for each sign. Each set features a \"selfie pencil\" with backwards writing to fulfill all your selfie needs...we see you, Leo. \u003cbr\u003eBox size: 8 \u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e¼\" H x 3 ⅜\" W x ½\" L\u003cbr\u003eSold in 4-packs\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003e \u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576963379340,"sku":"LIB-P","price":7.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_ASTROLOGYPENCILS_GREEN_SMALLSQUARE_LIB-P.jpg?v=1772050603"},{"product_id":"astrology-pencils-virgo-new","title":"Astrology Pencils Virgo","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-size: 20px;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-family: verdana,geneva,sans-serif;\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eVIRGO\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003eAugust 23 - September 22\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eVirgo Traits:\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e• Perfectionist\u003cbr\u003e• Hypochondriac\u003cbr\u003e• Methodical\u003cbr\u003e• Critical\u003cbr\u003e• Hyperactive\u003cbr\u003e• Self-Involved\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003ePencils:\u003c\/b\u003e \u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• I COUGHED NOW I'M DEAD\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• LIST-MAKING PENCIL\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• LET ME OVERTHINK THAT\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• THAT TOTALLY REMINDS ME OF ME\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cspan\u003e• I EXCEL IN RANDOM WORST-CASE SCENARIOS\u003cbr\u003e• SCHEDULING AN IMPROMPTU PARTY!\u003cbr\u003e• VIRGOS FOLD TOWELS PERFECTLY\u003cbr\u003e• NOBODY'S PERFECT (EXCEPT VIRGOS)\u003c\/span\u003e [Backwards selfie pencil!]\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eContains 8 Standard No. 2 Pencils\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e© 2020 Whiskey River Soap Co.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003e8 custom pencils made specifically for each sign. Each set features a \"selfie pencil\" with backwards writing to fulfill all your selfie needs...we see you, Leo. \u003cbr\u003eBox size: 8 \u003cspan data-mce-fragment=\"1\"\u003e¼\" H x 3 ⅜\" W x ½\" L\u003cbr\u003eSold in 4-packs\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Whiskey River Soap Co.","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":40576963510412,"sku":"VIR-P","price":7.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0601\/1944\/9740\/files\/WRS_ASTROLOGYPENCILS_GREENHAND_SMALLSQUARE_VIR-P.jpg?v=1772051215"}],"url":"https:\/\/whiskeyriversoapco.com\/collections\/desktop.oembed?page=3","provider":"Whiskey River Soap Wholesale","version":"1.0","type":"link"}